Monday, April 18, 2005

shash's anger management

today was one of those days when i realized how glad i am to know some dogs and cats. and to have some good friends. and to have good friends who will stand up for what is right, alongside me. it was one of those days when some people in positions of power in my life did some FUCKED UP SHIT.

i don't know why it continually surprises me when people i have respected betray me or those around them. i guess i would prefer to still be surprised, because if i wasn't, i'd be perpetually depressed and disgusted with humans. i know this particular disappointment will pass. i just have to figure out how to let go of my anger, to stop shaking. i think i will be doing a lot of hard swimming this week. speed swimming. kicking the water with all my might (in my bathing suit that is way too floral compared to all those navy blue speedo swimmers in the pool).

at times like this i think about how privileged i am, and how people who have less power in society than i do must experience so many more abuses of power, on a daily (or almost daily) basis. how do these people keep from dying inside? how do they trust? how do they keep the dream of justice alive? i guess maybe they know some dogs and cats and have some good friends too.


mati rose said...

i wonder about this too. have you seen the movie "hotel rwanda" yet? this question is asked to the extreme. i hope you have some clarity through the anger soon!

Kim Carney said...

Yes, I think about this all the time. It is perplexing, depressing, maddening.